Wednesday, March 09, 2011

House 4 Sale 4 Ever!?

You may remember this post back in September.  We had put our house up for sale.  We had felt the Lord nudging us to do this for awhile.  And we felt strongly last summer it was time.  It was a hard decision.  We love our house.  It fits our family.  Besides having enough bedrooms for each child, it also has an office for Mark, since he does work from home.  It is a great house for parties.  It is OUR house.

We found a house we were ready to buy, just as soon as our house sold.  We felt it was the perfect situation, had room for all of us.  They were willing to wait till we sold.   We just knew for sure that our house would sell fast.  It is a GREAT house! Who wouldn't want it?? 
Well at this point, we have no idea who wants it! It is still for sale.  At first, it showed quite a bit.  Then as the holidays and cold weather came, we had fewer and fewer showings.  Which was honestly just fine with me.  Can you even imagine how hard it is keeping up with a house while homeschooling and five kids?   Yep, it is that bad.  But no showings mean no selling. 
And the house we were planning to buy? Is listed for sale.  Which we are fine with, because they can't wait forever. What if we never sell?  What if that is not meant to be our house?   We have no worries that if it is meant to be ours, it will work out.  Though let me tell you how difficult it is to find a house that fits all of us.  It is not about everyone having their own space.  But we do have an age range of kids, and we do homeschool and Mark does have to have a quiet place for an office.  We have looked at other options, we are still looking.  

For the first 6 months, I was fine with WHATEVER happened.  But now? I am getting anxious.  Our reason for selling?  To have more money.   Why do we need MORE money? Because God has given us a heart for orphans.  We are in a place now where we feel stuck with what we can do. Which is take care of our children.  Afford our insurance (ugh!)  Believe me, we are fine.  We are not starving.  And in reality? We CAN stay in this house and keep doing as we are doing.  But we can NOT do more.   And that bothers us.   We are not selling for us, we are selling for them..

The children that are still waiting.  God has called us to help orphans, and right now we are trying to be still and listen to what that means.  Because there are SO many..

Beautiful children who have nothing.   We have so much.  To much. 

But not enough to give them what they deserve.   Which is what makes it so confusing.  We WANT to sell! We held on to our house for longer than we should have probably, with hands clenched tight, not wanting to let go.  And now we are willing, we have come to peace with it, we WANT it to sell.  Yet nothing.   So we try to listen some more.  What is HIS plan?  

 We continue to listen.   And wait.  Spending much time in prayer.  Wondering what our future holds, but trying to stay in the moment.  Till He answers.  We know He will.   
(we did have it painted, I kind of miss my orange and red, but a nice change!) 


Jodi said...

My Bible study this week has seemed to focusing on having peace even when God closes doors - even when we are asking for something that would be pleasing to Him. His timing is worth waiting for! I know you know this!
Praying for y'all!

Mom to my China Posse said...

Beautiful post, beautiful children. I share your heart for the orphan, praying with you.

Anonymous said...

I also share your heart for orphans! I am an Adoption Social Worker. I love, love my job! Have you considered fostering/adopting locally? You should qualify for adoption subsidies through your local Department of Social Services by adopting a special needs child. THere is such a need locally. I'm sure you have considered that as a possibility in the past, but I just thought I'd throw it out there in case you were unfamiliar with adoption subsidies!