Wednesday, April 16, 2008


**Warning, if you are an adoptive parent easily offended, don’t read on! ;-)

I read an article recently on some site that was supposed to help you prepare for adoption/travel/your new child, etc.. And I came across this article under a section called whats hot, titled, “Getting rid of gotcha”. Interesting. For those of you who don’t know, Gotcha Day in adoption world, typically refers to the day you meet your child. And so I read the article and once again have found more “rules” in adoption world I just had no idea about! Honestly as I read it thought it was a joke. No, sadly it was true. Apparently saying Gotcha Day is offensive. Maybe you all know this, I must be slow to catch on to these things. Some parents refuse to call it Gotcha day, so they refer to it as

Metcha Day
Forever Family Day
Adoption Day
Family Day
“child's name” day
Siblings Day
And the list goes on.

The article said “ when you catch a mosquito, you say Gotcha. How awful that we use the same term when speaking of our children.” Are you kidding me?

Here is what I have learned. Some people have WAY more time on their hands to dissect the silliest things! Are we seriously that worried about the term we use for that day? Wow! I honestly just had to laugh! Who really cares WHAT we call it? Does it really require writing a magazine article to warn new parents NOT to say gotcha?

August 21st, 2006, God handed me the most amazing gift. I GOT my Sage! WE became a forever family. My life was changed in only ways that God could have ordained. It is among the most memorable day of my life. YOU can refer to it as whatever YOU want, and I will happily refer to it as I want. It is a day I will celebrate till the day I die, and I could care less if it is labeled “Sage’s gotcha, metcha, forever family, placed in her parents arms, planned from the beginning of time, she is a Laxton, Day!”

I guess the thing to me that I just don't get is this. How can we even care what it is called? How can some people look at that day and really worry about the terminology that was used for it. I look at August 21st 2006 and the name is NOT what pops into my head. My daughters face, the way she felt when I finally held her in my arms, the smells, the look in her eyes, THOSE are the things I think about from that day. I can still FEEL the way I felt on that day, the way she felt in my arms. I can promise you, it did not feel as if I was swatting a mosquito! ;-)

So before anyone leaves me a comment telling me I am going to ruin my childrens lives because I don't worry about these things, don't bother. If you want to get rid of gotcha, you go ahead! I have MUCH more important things to worry about like, how can I will an I171 into my mailbox, or how can we possibly get to China near the Olympics or, how can we change the world so every orphan has a GOTCHA day which actually means they all have families! Those are my worries.


Our House of Five said...

A big HOORAY for "GOTCHA" day! My kids absolutely love "GOTCHA" day and no it matters not what you label the day, make it your own and love your life!

I personally make and sell custom "GOTCHA" day t-shirts...I have no complaints!


Amy said...

Yes, that was my first thought when I heard about Gotcha Day, "Oh, bad idea. Isn't that what people say when they catch a mosquito?" Ha! Just kidding. I'm pretty sure I've NEVER said that. Too funny!

Cassie said...

I am with you. Some people has way to much time on their hands.

But I can tell you when Caleb was placed in my arms that same year 2006 in August he was screaming, crying and just plain hysterical. I didn't think of it at the time but could have said to him.....Caleb don't worry I GOTCHA....I am not going anywhere you are safe. Instead all I said to him in litnany style Wo ani....I LOVE YOU. But boy wouldn't it have been great to think of the first response first....

Blessings to you and the clan.

Anonymous said...

You GO GIRL!!!! I loved seeing the pictures of our precious Sage again. Give all the kids a kiss from Aunt Bubby!!!!

Anonymous said...
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Waiting for Mia Hope! said...

Amen Sister! I'm right there with ya. We have always called it "Gotcha" Day and we always will!!! Here is the legal definition of "got": to receive or come to have possession, use, or enjoyment of
It doesn't say anything about smacking a bug!

Finally a Family of Four said...

I really have to hold back here, I am one of those people who do not sweat the small stuff. I call the day that I held Lily Gotch Day and the day we returned fom China and was reunited with our son Family Day. But all in all, who really cares what people call it. If someone can write a whole article about what to call it, good for them. I can only wish that i had that much time on my hands.

Taylor Grace said...

Good for you. You are right, people have too much time on their hands if they are disecting the term "Gotcha Day".

Kim said...

I love the term "Gotcha Day" and as far as catching bugs...hmmm well, our DTC group was the dragonflies...and I consider Jaiden a "butterfly" in does that make her a bug? She's cute as a bug...cuter actually and I don't take any offense to anyone saying so :)

Can I swipe your song "She's a butterfly?" I'd never heard it before - it's so beautiful! I am trying to renew Jaiden's blog your blog! It's very pretty! Isn't Blog Fairy the awesomest!

Marcy said...

LOL Shannon! Not only do some people have too much time on their hands, but some just "want" to get offended. I would never say anything to anyone to intentionally offend, especially my children. But please! I mean, what if I use "Anna Day" and one of my other kids gets upset because it has now excluded them from the celebration...what if we use "Forever Family Day" and it makes my adopted daughter feel that we didn't think of her as a member of our family until that specific day, what if blah, blah, blah. Love the made me laugh :-)

Marcy in KY