Rosebud

 You might have read my posts about a precious little blossom I fell in love with while at Chenzhou this summer. If not, feel free to hear my heart here and here.

I knew that to adopt her would take a miracle.

I also KNOW the God of miracles and believe in His plans.

So, I felt pretty secure in trusting that if she was meant to be mine, she would be.

Through some conversations with Chenzhou, it led to some conversations with my husband. Who is convinced we are done.

Funny guy he is. I should remind you he was done 3 kids ago.

BUT, because he loves God more than his own agenda, he agreed to tell Chenzhou we would bring her home if we could.

I love him.

We passed this on to Chenzhou.  And in return found out that Rosebud is going to be adopted domestically.  

Mixed emotions.

One on hand, I am thrilled! She did not even have paperwork started.  So to know she will have a family, it is what each child deserves!

BUT… She will remain in China.  Forever.  Does  her family to be know God? Do they have a relationship with him?  Will SHE know Him?

It confirmed to me WHY I am going. Why God has planted deep in my heart a love for this country. What my job is.  And why I will return.

Chenzhou was so sweet when they told me the news. They felt bad! I assured them that I was thrilled for Rosebud to have a family, that is my prayer for each child.

What about us? Are we looking?  Mark said he feels like this part of our marriage is ground-hog day. Every so many months we have the same exact same discussion.   I am still not sure what the answer is. Honestly. I am open to another, BUT I also know I am being called to care for the orphans in more ways than adoption. So, for now, we just wait.

And for those of you who think we have enough? I am glad you have an opinion. That is great! However, I do not care. 

Because until there are no more orphans, I will continue to be open to Gods plan.Whatever that might be.